What a joke…
So, these are on sale today on Gilt and I’m just floored by the balls these people must have. And I’m floored by the gullibility of the people who buy this. I mean, somebody must be buying them or they wouldn’t be in business right? Anyways, apparently if you put these on your face you won’t get pimples and it will reduce wrinkles, depending on which one you use. Officially:
“Using superior technology developed by NASA, the Baby Quasar works by stimulating the natural production of collagen in the skin, thereby diminishing the appearance of fine lines, wrinkles and enlarged pores. Extremely effective in firming and toning the skin and increasing blood flow and circulation, the Baby Quasar uses 24 LED’s in four discrete wavelengths of red and infrared light.”
This is pure bullshit. And even if it wasn’t and by some miracle the light from LEDs did something beneficial for my skin I’m not going to pay $500 bucks for it! I’ll just go rub my face in the christmas lights! Cmon people, this isn’t the 1920′s! Actually the 20′s were better, at least they were advertising for things that worked – Coke! Delicious and refreshing! (Yeah it was, cause it had cocaine in it), Stay slim with your very own tapeworm! (hey, you will actually lose some weight. In fact, I’m gonna go get some tapeworms right now and start my new business! “Lose weight by meeting my little friend!”)
Olga 3:23 am on December 25, 2009 Permalink
Don’t forget the key phrases in your worm/diet business. You must use important sounding lines like “developed by a New York Cardiologist” it wouldn’t sound the same if you said “developed by a Mississippi Bariatric MD”. Don’t forget the all important timetable. You must keep it very specific, example “Lose 300 pounds in just 32 weeks! not 31 weeks, not “lose 300 pounds in about 7 months” 32 Weeks and I’m done! So when can I get my worms? Were they trained by NASA to eat fat fast? Are they discrete?