constructive criticism

Alternate post title: Why everyone needs an ex-boyfriend

Emily: So I’m experimenting with this new ‘do and testing the lower limits of hair maintenance.
Dylan: Huh, is that what happened?
Emily: Yes. I towel-dried it for about 5 seconds before I left the house this morning. This is the absolute minimum amount of effort one could put into their hair. I’m not sure if it is working for me.
Dylan: [long pause] I think the key is to make it look intentional. You don’t want it to look like you passed out on your face and someone shaved the back of your head.